The first is the habit of developing a shrewd attitude about what’s BEHIND promises made to you. Philosopher Ludwig Wittgenstein determined that human behavior is driven by agendas. People who make promises want something in return. What’s BEHIND the promise is what he refers to as a game of chess. Usually, it’s greater or equal to the promise. It’s your responsibility to figure that out.
The second is the gift of listening. Growing up I was always talking. But, when I got in a profession where I had to listen to 95% of the conversation I started making a lot of money.
The third is to say thank you and I’m sorry. My wife taught me that. Had I known the power of those two words, my growing up years would have been far, far more pleasant and successful.
The fourth is not to be a messenger boy. I once said to my young daughter, “please tell your brother to stop doing that.” Her response was brilliant for a sixth grader. “I don’t carry messages.” Honest, honest, I had to learn that the hard way as a management consultant. A client paid me a lot of money, but in exchange I had to carry his messages to certain executives. I turned out to be nothing more than an errand boy, a slave actually. I swore I would never do that again, no matter how much money I was paid.
The fifth is save money when you are young. When I married my wife she had six hundred dollars in the bank and a Corvair that was paid for. She worked our first year of marriage and saved thirty dollars a week and would not let us spend more than fifty dollars a month on rent while our peers were spending seventy five to one hundred dollars a month. Fifty three years later we’re still saving out of a deep seeded habit. We’ve always been a bit delayed in participating in the material world. But we have while still having a buck or two to cushion for the blows that always come.
The sixth is never give up on love. When all before us is seen for what it is: a stage, a set, actors, and scripts that are all temporary and come down after the performance, we are fortunate to know that love is real and it is permanent. To love someone deeply and to be loved in return has carried me all the way through the stage play of life. It only takes one to love you and for you to return that love.