Honest About Sex

I’ve never talked much about sex

I’ve never written about sex until now

That’s unusual because there’s so much sex around

Have I had sex?

Please, I have five children.

It’s extraordinary the feeling I had
during the sex I’ve had

But I felt guilty
after the sex I had

I never asked why guilt was a part of the sex I had

After a time the guilt passed
Then it was just the pleasure I had

I feel guilty writing
about the sex I’ve had

There were times on the road when I was tempted
to have sex

I didn’t

I was afraid if I did my career would end
with the church I was in

I didn’t want to hurt my wife and children either

That’s why I didn’t have sex then

As time passed my desire for sex waned
Not quickly but indeed it did

I took pills to have more sex again

It was embarrassing
For afterwards I couldn’t relax

Not even while shopping at the market a few blocks down

Hunched over
wearing a hat and sunglasses
I was spotted and asked

Why I was hunched over?

I hurt my back I said

I felt like I was lying to my mother again

So I didn’t take those pills again

Alas, I was relaxed once again